Wishcast Wednesday: What limits do you wish to set?

My choices today are to search through a dozen gig of photos for one that suits this theme, or to go outside with a cup of tea and watch the rain. The kettle is boiling as we speak.

This week over at Jamie Ridler Studios, the theme of Wishcasting Wednesday is the question what limits do you wish to set? I've spent the day with this question at the back of my mind, trying to narrow down the list in my head. Maybe I'd like so-and-so to stop doing that annoying thing they do... maybe I'd like to set a limit on phone calls late at night... there were just too many options until I realised one very important fact: every single idea was something I would like to see other people limit, in order to lessen its impact on me.

Silly, huh?

I wonder sometimes how many people feel the same. Does anyone else ever sigh deeply and accept unfair treatment, all the while getting frustrated that nobody in their close knit circle treats them with the dignity and respect they want? Has anyone else ever sat there and let themselves be verbally abused and blamed for things that they had nothing to do with? Has anyone else excused ill treatment because the other person is overtired, sick, stressed, or they need to vent? Has anyone else ever bitten back their anger because those justifications are self inflicted? Oh, she promised to be here but she went out partying last night and needs to sleep.... that's fine.

I'm guessing probably a lot. A lot of people probably crawl into bed some nights, devastated that they move heaven and earth for people who treat them so poorly. It would be so wonderful if they could realise their poor behaviour and change it, wouldn't it? You'd be happy then.

It's obscenely easy to externalise, to ignore your issues and focus on someone elses. But what if, instead of begrudgingly wishing that the people around me would change how they treated me, I wished for the ability to set myself limits as to how much bad behaviour I'll accept from those around me? What if I gave up wishing for some mythical white knight to stop the badness, and got to work channelling my inner Macguyver and scrounging up some rubber bands and chip packets? I'm guessing it'll be a lot more interesting than sitting alone in a room drumming my fingers and doing my one woman version of 'Waiting for Godot'.

This week, then, I wish for the strength to set myself limits, to stop myself accepting hurtful behaviours out of fear of causing trouble. I wish for the strength to see the difference between 'causing trouble' and protecting myself from unfair treatment.

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Sandy VanNocker said...

You got it...you can only change you! As you wish for yourself, so I wish for you!

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